It's Showtime!

Hey everyone,

I've got some great news! Butterball and I are soon going to be blowing up the airwaves to help promote our role on My First Baby.com.

We've landed one radio spot for sure, and it looks like another station is reaching out to us as well! Yay!!!
Although I have to admit, it feels a little weird for me to be referring to 'us.' That's another multi-person pronoun I'll have to get used to (just like when SFD and I became a 'we').

I'll keep you posted on stations and times as we secure our spots - thanks in advance for tuning in and supporting us!!

Also - I got an awesome shout-out from My First Baby.com's host, Jill Cordes, on her blog. You can read it here! Thank you, Jill, for helping a future mummy out!!

As for my pregnancy, here's my current stats:

I'm 30 weeks preggo which puts me at 7 1/2 months. I'm still feeling really good for the most part (yes, I realize how lucky I am), although I've noticed a few odd things cropping up in these later months.

One) I feel uncomfortable after I eat. Like there isn't enough room for the food so it camps out in my esophagus and makes my chest all tight. Ugh.

Two) My fatigue has returned. I'm lucky to still be awake at 9 pm to write this!!

Three) WARNING - Total TMI here: I'm a pooping machine. I understand some women suffer from constipation and the Big H's during their pregnancy. I am the total opposite. If human waste was good for manure, I could be running a friggin' organic farm by now. Seriously. Buy stock in Cottonell.

Four) SFD and I attended a 'labor experience' class earlier this week. While I feel much more prepared for what I'll experience prior to delivery (called the stages of labor), I've decided there is no way this baby is coming out.

Nugget or Nuggette?

I can't believe the moment we've been waiting 5 (long) months for is finally almost here! In less than a week, SuperFutureDad and I will know who we'll be welcoming to our family. It's just the most exciting thing to happen in like, forever!!! Ok, besides our wedding day. And when we got engaged. Well, it's one of the most exciting things that will happen in our lifetimes. I get to be a part of the Mommyhood!

So, I'm conducting a little informal poll - what do you think we're having? A Nugget or a Nuggette??
Cast your votes here!

Meantime, some other exciting things have been developing with baby. About a week ago I was lying in the dark just before bed and all of a sudden, BLURP!, in my belly. Did I feel something, I wondered? So I waited... and waited... then BLURP! That had to be it, right? That had to be our baby!!!!

But then... nothing. For the next couple of days it was like it was all dream. I tried to figure out a way to describe it to SuperFutureDad. I've heard it called 'the flutter,' 'bubbles,' 'swishes,' things like that. Here's what I came up with: You know when you're swimming in water when there is fish present? You'll be floating along, and then out of nowhere, a fish comes and skims your leg? It's like you definitely feel something brush against you, but it's diluted because of the water. To me, that's how Butterball feels. I know - what a weird description, right?? After those first couple of days of dormancy, BB has, for the most part, been jazzercising like crazy.

My favorite moment so far came last night. I was lying on the couch after another long day at work and stuffing my face with kettle corn. I love me some kettle corn!!!! SFD and I were talking about our days when WHAM!, Butterball goes karate on my bladder. I mean straight down karate chop! I kinda laughed and told SFD baby is either angry or as majorly in love with kettle corn as I am. A few seconds later, WHAM! karate chop to the bladder. I just pictured BB taking an elbow straight down - like breaking a board - except it's my bladder! WHAM! WHAM! WHAM!

Needless to say I got up to pee and that was it for BB. He/She stayed quiet the rest of the night.

My First Baby

Well - I've finally done it! I've completed my first video for My First Baby!

It's been a long time coming since I found out AGES ago that SuperFutureDad and I had been picked by Meredith Video Studios to be a part of this fantastic - and fun - project.

If you haven't visited My First Baby before, you're in for a treat. It's an online community where first-time moms and moms-to-be share their experiences on their journey toward the Mommyhood. The best part is, it's all video so you get to see people's cute little nuggets or you get to watch their bellies expand (like mine is!!!).

My introductory video is live so if you have 30 seconds (the videos are only between 30 secs and a minute) please check it out and leave a comment. I'd love to hear from you now that you can actually see what I look like carrying Butterball! Plus, feel free to leave me ideas for videos that you'd like to see in the future!!!!

And don't forget that some of the webisodes will be featured on a nationally-syndicated lifestyle television show called 'Better.' You can also follow 'My First Baby' and 'Better' on Facebook and Twitter.

OH! Before I go, I should also give you an update on where I am in this journey!

I am in my 18th week of pregnancy (4 1/2 months) and feeling great!!! My energy has returned. The headaches and insomnia have, for the most part, subsided. I can definitely tell I am gaining some weight - won't be too long before I need to move fully into maternity wear. I'm getting my exercise from mowing the lawn and walking to the pool and swimming. If I could swim everyday, I would - it's the best!

As for Butterball, here's what BabyCenter has to say:

Head to rump, your baby is about 5 1/2 inches long (about the length of a bell pepper) and he weighs almost 7 ounces. He's busy flexing his arms and legs — movements that you'll start noticing more and more in the weeks ahead. His blood vessels are visible through his thin skin, and his ears are now in their final position, although they're still standing out from his head a bit. A protective covering of myelin is beginning to form around his nerves, a process that will continue for a year after he's born. If you're having a girl, her uterus and fallopian tubes are formed and in place. If you're having a boy, his genitals are noticeable now, but he may hide them from you during an ultrasound.

What a Good SFD!

On Father's Day, I feel it's only fitting to acknowledge and thank the hubs for being such a great partner, especially during these first four months of pregnancy. He may not realize I notice all the little things he does, but I try keep up (he does so many)! So here is brief list of SuperFuture Dad's best moments:

1.) Buying me cherries and protein-enhanced bread. I happened to mention the other day that I was craving cherries and lo and behold, what do I find in the fridge yesterday?! Fresh, beautiful, red, ripe cherries! Yum-o! He also knows I've been having a tough time eating meat and therefore getting enough protein. As I was deciding on what to eat for breakfast this morning, I pulled open the breadbox and saw a brand new loaf of bread that reads "protein-enriched." He's very thoughtful.

2.) Giving me massages and foot rubs. I don't often like massages - I have a hard time relaxing during them. But SuperFutureDad gets in there anyway, not letting me squirm away. He works his fingers in just like I ask him to which is very nice. He also does not shy away from pulling my toes and rubbing my feet. My toes have never cracked so good - Thank You!!!!

3.) Scooping and filling the cat litter. Believe it or not, this is actually a chore I miss. I love the idea of caring for my kitties and making sure they're poop is getting scooped is something I know makes them happy. However, since getting KU'd, SuperFutureDad has really stepped up (and to be honest, he's had to because of risks of toxoplasmosis). And even when I said I'd take care of the litter when he goes away on a trip next week, he flinched and said he'd rather I not I risk it because of the potential for birth defects when dealing with cat feces. So I'll be calling his dad. Another good man!

4.) Letting me sleep. I've slept a lot during my pregnancy. Sometimes 12 hours a night. That means I've let some household chores slip by the wayside. He's never bothered me if I need to catch some shut eye and he's never made me feel bad for not keeping up my end of the chores. Not that he would do either of those things, anyway. But it's still a lovely attribute and I'd like to say thanks.

5.) Going to baby classes with me. We haven't officially gone to our first parenting class yet, but when we received the list of available classes to take from the doctor, he pulled out his schedule and made sure we picked classes we could both attend. It will be so nice to have my partner there!!

6.) Spending a 'baby day' with me. On one particular day off that we both shared, SFD really wanted a burger and fries. I couldn't stomach the idea and suggested a stir-fry place instead. He agreed. Then I said, "Why don't we stop at some baby stores and check out some cribs?" He said, "Sure. How many stores?" "Four," I said. And without even raising an eyebrow, he agreed. And so we spent the entire day doing baby stuff. We ate stir-fry because all I can stomach is veggies and tofu. We went to eco-friendly stores, baby boutiques, and big box stores all in the name of seeing what's what when it comes to baby cribs and gear. And I have to say, it was so much fun!!! So thanks for being a great SuperFutureDad!!!!!

I love you!!! Happy Father's Day.   

14 weeks

I think I've been really lucky. And I DO NOT take it for granted. I'm not just talking about the fact that SuperFutureDad and I are actually going to have a baby. A baby!!! I'm talking about my pregnancy journey so far.

Unlike some of my best friends, I have not had a terrible amount of nausea. I'm very thankful for that because it was really tough to hear and watch them feel so sick for, seriously, 9 months. Ugh.

But I haven't been without some side-effects. Here's a quick breakdown of what Butterball has been up to:

First Two Weeks (I found out within the first week of conception that I was preggers): Energy burst and extreme hunger. Like, every two hours hungry. But only for super healthy stuff. Carrots, cheese, almonds, fruit, granola. Yummy!

Latter Half of First Month and Second Month: Extreme aversion to meat. No chicken, fish, beef. YUCK!! This was really difficult to deal with because I had two trips planned during this time; Las Vegas (with the girls) and Belize (with the hubs). Needless to say, it was super hard to keep nugget a secret during Vegas but we told everyone in Belize because we were there with all my besties from high school! Love you guys!!!

There was also a lot of fatigue during this time. I became the queen of cat naps in my car, on the couch at work and in the living room chair. These areas have never seen so much drool in all their existence!!

Third Month: This is where things get weird. Like I said, I've been very lucky, but two of my side-effects have been painful and annoying to handle. Headaches and insomnia. I get pounding headaches about 3 times a week. They start with a mild but persistent pain on the left side of my forehead but within hours erupt into a crescendo of full-scale, wrinkle-inducing agony encompassing my entire cranium. OUCH! I end up having to lay down in a darkened room and trying to sleep it off, which can take hours. If I don't do this, I end up nauseous with major dry heaves. Nothing ever comes out, but the dry heaving leaves me teary-eyed with snot rippling from my nose. Pleasant, no? I think this is why SuperFutureDad hightails it out of the room when the "hwaph" chorus begins.

The insomnia is a whole other mess. Virtually every night I wake up around 3:30 and am wide-eyed for about 2 to 2 1/2 hours. This is not a good thing, especially the days I have to work. The days I don't work, I can handle it by taking a fabulous cat nap. There is really no rhyme or reason to what I think about during these pitch-black hours and most of it I can't remember anyway. Although I do remember crafting a nasty letter in my head to someone (or something) that shall remain nameless. It was good, too!

This all leads me to my desires as I continue with my fourth month of pregnancy:
No more headaches!
No more insomnia!
Back to better eating - I know I need more protein so will vow to find someway to stomach meat products
Find a consistent exercise routine - I'd like to get back into yoga
Create a plan for how to prepare for Butterball over the latter half of pregnancy - nursery, finances, day care, registry

Enjoy this time!!!!! I am anxious to feel nugget move... I think that is the biggest step I want to experience next.

For your reference, here's a handy guide from BabyCenter.com on how Butterball is developing:

This week's big developments: Your baby can now squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his thumb! Thanks to brain impulses, his facial muscles are getting a workout as his tiny features form one expression after another. His kidneys are producing urine, which he releases into the amniotic fluid around him — a process he'll keep up until birth. He can grasp, too, and if you're having an ultrasound now, you may even catch him sucking his thumb.

In other news: Your baby's stretching out. From head to bottom, he measures 3 1/2 inches — about the size of a lemon — and he weighs 1 1/2 ounces. His body's growing faster than his head, which now sits upon a more distinct neck. By the end of this week, his arms will have grown to a length that's in proportion to the rest of his body. (His legs still have some lengthening to do.) He's starting to develop an ultra-fine, downy covering of hair, called lanugo, all over his body. Your baby's liver starts making bile this week — a sign that it's doing its job right — and his spleen starts helping in the production of red blood cells. Though you can't feel his tiny punches and kicks yet, your little pugilist's hands and feet (which now measure about 1/2 inch long) are more flexible and active.

Two Lines? I Cannot Tell a Lie.

Boy, has it been a while since you've heard from me!  But I promise there is a very good reason.

About 3 months ago... well... nearly 14 weeks ago in fact, I found out SuperFutureDad and Almost Mommy were going to become SuperDad and First Time Mommy!!

I know! Hard to believe, right?? We are no longer in the land of no nuggets!

After nearly a year of trying to conceive, we finally knocked boots at the right time to get me knocked up! Here's the proof:

Needless to say, it's been an incredibly difficult secret to keep from my blogosphere buddies but one that I felt needed to stay between me and SFD and our families. But now that we've spilled the beans to our closest friends and relatives, we're happy to share the fantastic news with the world!

And we are going to be doing exactly that (no joke!) for a new Webisode series called 'My First Baby,' produced by Meredith Video Studios. How cool is that! You can find the webisodes and all the program information at this web addy (although they tell me it won't be live until June 14th). So please be sure to check back then (I'll send you a reminder, too).

The Webisodes will also be featured on a nationally-syndicated lifestyle television show called 'Better.'
To find out where and when 'Better' airs in your area, click here! Just so you know Nai Nai, 'Better' airs on the Fort Myers Fox station WFTX at 6:00 am. And I know you're up at that ridiculous hour, so you should be able to catch it.

You can also follow 'My First Baby' and 'Better' on Facebook and Twitter.
We filled out a written application, passed two rounds of phone interviews and submitted a (laughable) application tape to get accepted and we are so pumped! Now, all of our friends and family who live far away can be a part of our pregnancy experience and beyond.

Here's how it works: they are sending us a Flip Cam (it's in the mail now) and we go to town shooting video of the ups and downs of the next, in our case, 6 months before delivering our little nugget. Then we do some more shooting after we bring our little bundle home! It's going to be a really uplifting and positive look at what life is really like for us as new parents, although we're not immune to a brisk dose of reality either. We've already found out that day cares in our area have waiting lists stretching into April 2011!! So, I'm sure this will be a really eye-opening experience and it will all be captured on tape.

So... what I want to do now is take your questions!!! Since I haven't written for so long, I'm sure you're curious as to how this all happened, how I've been feeling, etc. But maybe you're not and just want me to get on with keeping you up to date from this point on. Either way, I love feedback and want to hear from you!

I'm baaaaaaacccckkkkk!

It's a Procreation Vacation!

Howdy doo world wide web highway neighbors! It's a great day isn't it? It's cold as heck here, a massive spring flood is just around the corner and I've got to return to the 9-5 today (although it's more like 12 - 10:30 pm).

But you know what, all sarcasm aside, life is good. March Madness is on its way, I've got holidays scheduled for April, a rockin' concert to see in June and an indoor soccer league that is starting up soon!

Yippee!!

Oh! And one other thing - I'm making my debut as a guest writer on The Vacation Gals!

My first post is up - it's all about me and SuperFutureDad's version of a babymoon!

You can check it out here! I hope you like it.....

Proof Positive

Gosh - it's amazing that making a simple choice could yield such massively positive results.

A while ago I wrote this piece, about my efforts to live my life like I've always imagined. And by that I mean, being a good person. Not great. Not excellent. Just good. Simple. Honest. Open.

I talked of what I thought I already did well in life and the things I'm pretty poor at doing.

My intention of writing this down was to make myself accountable. To myself. To my husband. To my family and friends. To the people who have so lovingly allowed me into their lives. And the rewards (unforeseen at the time), reinforce why this is the best life goal I could have ever set for myself.

I am seeing more of my gal (and guy) pals than ever before and we are all taking active efforts to be more involved in each other's lives. We have set up a dinner party group, gone out for a birthday bowling bash and even attended a different kind of party. I feel like a better friend and am so happy to know how my friends are doing in their lives - the good and the bad.

I am answering emails in a more timely manner, something I've been terrible at doing in the past. This has lead me to great volunteering opportunities reading to elementary school kids and a few new writing opportunities. Both things make me feel really happy.

I am noticing there is a time and a place for swearing. I will always, ALWAYS, have a sailor's vocabulary, but dropping an f*bomb while reading to kindergartner's is not something I want to be known for. However, I must say a massive thank you to this morning's first grade teacher for having a laugh with me when my Tommy Boy ring tone went off in class. Luckily, I reached it before it got to the dickhead part.

SuperFutureDad and I are saying things like 'please' and 'thank you' and 'I love you' more. That feels GREAT!!! Politeness goes a looooonnnnngggg way when dealing with the ones you love and they deserve graciousness and gratitude as much as - if not more than - the stranger for whom you open the door.

My world is still black and white but I'm trying to choose to ignore the things I can't change. This doesn't happen everyday but when it does, it's liberating. No toxic-energy for me! As tiara-wearing Julia Mancuso stated during the Olympics, 'save the drama for your mama.'

All of this being said, I am still a work in progress. That's life, eh? You live, you learn. You try to be good.

But if I find you putzing around the left lane forcing me to pass you on the right, I will still give you the bird. You deserve it.

State of Mind

Hey all - Big News!! 

I'm making my debut as a writer for a new Web site this week. It's called The Vacation Gals and it offers expert advice on family travel, girlfriend getaways and romantic escapes. I believe my post will be up on Wednesday, but I'll let you know for sure! 

SuperFutureDad has read and signed off on it, so I hope you will like it, too!

Meantime, check out my state of mind... what's yours??

Current read: sticking with Kathy Reichs... this time going with Grave Secrets. Seriously, if you like mystery and crime novels - or the TV show 'Bones' - you will LOVE her books.

Current TV Show Obsession: The Inbetweeners 

You. Must. Watch. This. Show.

Current Song Addiction: Live Like You Were Dying by Kris Allen... I'm not one to watch American Idol and I won't start because of this guy but he almost makes me want to... almost.

Current Movie Obsession: Inglorious Basterds by Quentin Tarantino. Yup... finally hopped on that bandwagon.

C

Baby Braggin' Wednesday: We Are So Screwed

OMG! I did something I totally shouldn't have today... and the results are, well, as scary as hell.

Let me explain...

A few months ago I became an avid follower of a couple of dozen blogs about parenting, motherhood, baby products and design. One day as I was checking the daily influx of postings to my Reader, I spotted an entry from a blog written by a married gal who, at the time, was trying to conceive her first child. She, like me, had done something she probably shouldn't have... and, like me, the results were terrifying.

You see, she was writing about a Web site called Make Me Babies - a computer-generated ripoff of Conan O'Brien's (love him!) legendary 'If They Mated' segments. It's supposed to give you an example of what your Future Nugget will look like. So I'm doing things a little different this week for Baby Braggin' Wednesday. And you'll soon see why it's entitled 'We Are So Screwed'!

SuperFutureDad and I are the average, All-American couple; blond, blue-eyed, big-boned. Here's what we looked like on our fabulous wedding day. Isn't he a dream?? I realize my face is partially covered so for those of you who don't know me, this may not be the best shot. But he looks great and that's why I want to use it here (thanks to Shari Bare Photography for our darling pics!!!).

So... you might think from that pic, that our future nugget might be a bit of a looker, no? That's right, NO, is the appropriate answer. I give you Evidence A - FutureNugget#1:

Look at the size of that our kid's forehead!!!! Captain Chesley "Sully" Sullenberger could've landed US Airways Flight 1529 on that thing! At least he/she/it has some cute freckles and a smile. Nice frame, too, btw.

But it all goes downhill from there my friends. Evidence B - FutureNugget#2:

 

This is too scary for words. And is that a tie around his neck? He looks like one of those creepy Benjamin Button kids who look like they're 80-years-old from birth. Wrong. So wrong.

Evidence C - FutureNugget#3:

 

Apparently our child will be Asian. I'm guessing we've adopted (which is something I've always wanted to do, btw). Maybe Make Me Babies knows something I don't.

Especially when you look at our daughter's brother - Evidence D - FutureNugget#4:

 

WTF??!!!

Oh, and look! We've adopted another daughter from Asia and this one has cornrows! Awesome!

Evidence E - FutureNugget#5:

 

These creations are just so funny! I'm not sure how SuperFutureDad feels about them, perhaps he'll leave a comment telling us?? (hint, hint)

In all seriousness, I would love to adopt children. It's a strenuous and expensive process and from what I hear from friends who have done it, entirely rewarding. So if this is what the future holds for us, then I am all for it!

Anyway, I've saved the best for last. I think we may have a winner!

Evidence F - FutureNugget#6:

 

Look at our cutie-patootie pirate!!! I'm loving the hair - ginger curls! A forehead slightly less prominent than Tyra Banks's. An adorable smile that will certainly get him out of trouble. I think this kid is as close to a perfect combination as we can get. No whammies here!

So... which one is your favorite??? Leave me a comment... and, if you're brave enough, email me your 'If They Mated' pics and I'll post a montage!!!!!

Ugly Betty Made Me Do It

So tonight I created my nest in the basement next to the fire and hunkered down for a good, old-fashioned boob-tube marathon. SuperFutureDad made his killer spinach lasagna, I burned the garlic toast and my cat, Daisy, licked the leftovers. If ever there was a perfect winter night, I think I experienced it.

Here's what I zoned out to on my Tivo's 'Now Playing' list:

NCIS
NCIS: Los Angeles
Grey's Anatomy/Private Practice (ABC's much-hyped crossover event)
The Good Wife (congrats to lead actress Juliana Margulies on her Golden Globe win)
Ugly Betty

And while I was watching all of that, my lov-er-ly Tivo was picking up CBS' Monday night comedy lineup: HYMYM, Accidentally on Purpose and Big, Bang Theory.

Ahhhhh, bliss.

But what really caught my attention in my otherwise mind-numbing glory was one of Ugly Betty's themes: finding inspiration. Betty Suarez, the lead character, started a blog that she hoped would inspire someone. Turns out, her blog inspired her boyfriend to move to Africa to work as a volunteer in a village in Botswana. Too bad for Betty, great for her man and the people his work will affect in Africa.

Well, now I'd like to introduce you to someone with her own connections to Africa. And what she and her family are about to do is, perhaps, the most inspiring story I've ever written.

"Most people would say that it takes guts to quit your job, sell most of your belongings, and pack up your husband and two children to move to Africa to run an orphanage. But Lindsay Erhardt of Fargo isn’t like most people. She radiates kindness, warmth and generosity. You feel it the moment she bursts into a room, arms extended for a hug even though you’ve just been introduced. And while this wife and mother of two humbly waives off the idea that’s she gutsy, there is no doubt she is about to undertake something many of us wouldn’t dare to do..."

Read the rest of the story at On The Minds of Moms Magazine... click here! 

While you're on OTMOM's Web site... don't forget to sign up to be their fan on Facebook! And while you're on Facebook, why not become my friend at Patricia Carlson? I look forward to connecting with you!

My 2010 Wish

Here's to having a little nugget to call our own in 2010!

Wish us luck!

All the best to you and yours as this new year begins.

Much love,
Patricia and SuperFutureDad

BABY BRAGGIN' WEDNESDAY: Lucy

I'm bbbbbaaaaaaaaccccccckkkkkkkkk!

After a wonderful week off to celebrate the holidays with my fabulous family, I've returned to the land of snow, snow and more snow! I couldn't believe my eyes when we first pulled into our driveway: there stood a 9-FOOT drift between our house and the neighbor's! Whoah!!! Lucky for me, SuperFutureDad took care of snowblowing duties. I was put in charge of grocery shopping, dishes and laundry. Welcome back to reality, I guess!

Also, welcome back Baby Braggin' Wednesday! If you don't know what BBW is, click here! I've got a gorgeous nugget to share with you, and guess what? It's a girl!

LUCY

Isn't she a doll??!! Lucy is a bubbly and bright-eyed 2-1/2-year-old who is eagerly anticipating her 3rd birthday this May! Boy, they grow up fast, don't they?!

Lucy belongs to a new friend of mine, Kris, who owns Pout Baby Boutique. Pout is a marvelous children's shop in Fargo that carries unique clothing, accessories and eco-friendly items for those special little nuggets in your life. Be sure to check out Pout's Web site and blog, too!

This precious peanut has a taste for life - literally! Her mum says Lucy will eat almost anything, including any kind of meat, fruit and vegetable (except for squash!). Plus, Kris has been known to find Lucy noshing on stickers, paper, even Band-Aid's ("Don't get me started on that one," her mummy says)!

Here's a great picture of Lucy at 3-weeks-old. The girl can rock a headband, can't she?!

Lucy is also known for her one-liner's - made all the more darling by her cute little lisp. Here's a quick sampling:  

"You’re my besth fwend momma"
“we’re printhethes (princesses)” 

“look at our beautiful home” 

“I lub you momma”  

“my shocks aren’t gonna hurt momma” (what she said to her mum on their way to Lucy's 2-year check up/shot appointment)

But I've saved the BEST story for last. Lucy is at that age where saying V's is difficult, so they come out more like B's. No big deal, right? Except for one specific word relating to being a girl.

Just before Lucy turned two, Kris realized her daughter didn't quite get the difference between certain parts of her anatomy. So Kris decided it was the right time to teach Lucy the real word - vagina.

Well... since Lucy can't say V's, when she said it, it came out more like - BAGINA! Kris says Lucy found the word fascinating and started saying it over and over. BAGINA, BAGINA, BAGINA!

"Although it seems to make Grandpa Dave a little uncomfortable, [Lucy] shouts it with pride every chance [she] gets and I have to admit, it makes me giggle almost every time," Kris says.

But wait, it gets better! 

One morning after Lucy got dressed, she glanced over at her mum and blurted out, "Momma, my bagina is HUNGRY!" Kris burst out laughing, which of course, made Lucy repeat it again and again and again.

What a kid! Lord only knows what she meant, but for us adults, it's a pretty hysterical line. And it will live on forever because Kris is keeping a blog just for Lucy. She writes in it just about everyday and of course, that story is one of her favorites!

Mine too.

BABY BRAGGIN' WEDNESDAY: Casey, Brady and Madelyn

Welcome to the first edition of Baby Braggin' Wednesday! So glad you could join me!


In case you're new to Tales, BBW is a weekly feature where I post pictures and cute little stories about all the little nuggets in my life and/or who belong to Tales readers like you. To be a part of BBW, all you have to do is email me some pics of your munchkin(s) and tell me a little about them. I'll craft up a blog entry from there that you can share with all your family and friends! It's my way of showing off all the cute little nuggets out there - and giving shout outs to all the fabulous peeps in my life! I love you all so much!

So... without further ado... here's our first BBW entry:

CASEY, BRADY AND MADELYN

I am the proud auntie to these remarkable (and athletic!) three kids. I don't get to see them very often, maybe once a year, and I miss them terribly. I've had to watch them grow up through pictures so that's why I thought they should be BBW's debut post. Casey, Brady and Madelyn are incredibly smart and cute - I can't wait to see them at Christmas!!!

Casey is the oldest. I am his Godmother. My favorite memory of Casey is teaching him to swim in Nai Nai and Ricky's pool in the Sunshine State. We spent hours in the pool working on floating and kicking and dunking and jumping (of course, he had a great start at swimming lessons with his mum and dad). But he's also a darn good soccer player!

Brady is one of the sweetest kids you'll ever meet. And one of the pickiest eaters! If this still holds true, last I knew, his favorite meal was chicken nuggets with sauce (ketchup). He loves fruit too. Brady has a wonderful imagination and will talk my ear off on the phone. It's so nice to hear his voice. Brady is sure to be a heartbreaker when he grows up - he's so cute!

Oh, Miss Madelyn - the youngest, and a girl, to boot!! Maddy is the perfect combination of her mum and dad's good looks - why this cutie isn't a child model is beyond me. That may have something to do with the fact that nobody tells Maddy what to do - she is in charge! And has the voice to prove it! But she is a ham in front of the camera and knows how to give a great hug. I don't know Maddy as well as Brady and Casey so I'm hoping she and I will have a chance to bond over the holidays.

So there you have it - Casey, Brady, and Madelyn are the first kids to be featured on Tales of an (Almost) Mommy's Baby Braggin' Wednesday column. I hope you enjoyed reading all about my fantastic nephews and niece! SuperFutureDad and I are the proudest uncle and auntie a kid could have!

If you have some pics and stories you'd like to submit for BBW, please email me at patriciacarlsonfreelance@gmail.com. I can't wait to share them with all the Tales readers!

BABY BRAGGIN' WEDNESDAY!

For those of you who are familiar with Tales, you know that SuperFutureDad and I are still in The Land of No Nuggets.  And it seems the older I get, the lonelier a place it is.

But whatever my situation is, it does not affect my crazy excitement whenever I find out one of my family members, friends, blog followers, or casual readers is preggers. I'm overjoyed (and yes, envious) each time one of them calls, texts, or writes with the news that they're entering Mommyhood.

It is for this reason that I'm announcing a new weekly column called Baby Braggin' Wednesday!

BBW, for short, is so you can show off your nugget with pictures, stories and fun, little facts. Each week, I'll select a little peanut to feature and write up a blog entry about him/her/them. I just need you to supply the pics and info!

Here's how it works:

Send me an email @ patriciacarlsonfreelance@gmail.com with your nuggets' name, age, birth date and where you live

Attach up to 3 pictures of your baby (toddlers and big kids accepted, too - I love 'em all!)

Include some baby braggin' info - this can be anything from birth stats or their first word to a funny thing they do or the moment you knew they were wicked smart

Once you've been picked, I'll notify you by email and get cracking putting together your kids' Baby Braggin' Wednesday profile! 

I'll admit my motives are a bit selfish in doing this but I really just want the chance to show off all the peanuts who belong to my friends and family. I am so proud of all of you and happy that you get to be mommies and daddies!

Besides, who doesn't get a smile on their face when looking at the chubby cheeks of a brand new baby?  I know I do!

The Rebel In Me

A few weeks ago, I did something I shouldn't have. Since that day, I've been spiraling downward into the bizarre baby-making world.

One morning, I started searching the World Wide Web Highway for other people like me: Baby-Jonesing gals who think it's (maybe?) time to start a family. What I found scared the crap out of me.

Cyberspace is FILLED with any-something women trying to have kids. And it seems none of them, like me, are having any luck.

Discovering that hundreds, if not thousands, of women are in the same baby-limbo as I am should bring me comfort. 'Now I have people to talk with who won't think I'm: A) off my rocker, B) annoying as a wax job starting to grow back, C) a whiny attention whore,' I remember thinking excitedly that fateful morning.

But frankly, finding all my new 'friends' on the Internet(s) sucks; it’s more depressing than I'd like to admit. There are just so darn many of them. It makes me feel hopeless.

Worse than that, not only are all of these women NOT pregnant, they're freaks!

They speak in alien tongue. Think I'm joking? See if you can decipher this sentence:

“i hope i get my BFP tomorrow but it is still early. i am 9 DPO today so tomorrow will be 10 DPO but i should get my AF by saturday or sunday so i am hoping it doesnt come!!! i hope all you ladies have GL with the BFP's this month.”

WTF???

Where’s the good old-fashioned, full-word girl talk? The Babymoon talk? The FutureNugget Name talk? To me… everything in that sentence is so… clinical. I can’t relate. Even though there is joy in it (she’s talking about hoping to get a positive pregnancy test reading before her period is due because she ovulated several days ago. Yeah, I’ll admit it, I’ve figured out the lingo.) the acronyms sound like a bad episode of Military Medical Mysteries. There’s a reason that show never got picked up.

My intention is not to anger, insult, or aggravate any of the women who frequent these sites or parlez in this foreign language. In fact, I think it’s quite brave that they are so open about their journey into Mommyhood. And, I find it comforting to know that women who’ve only ‘met’ virtually turn to each other for support.

My beef is that I don’t want to become one of them. Perhaps this is the rebel in me, but I don’t want to be consumed by trying to create a nugget. I don’t want to have to count my DPO (days past ovulation). Or take my BBT (basal body temperature). Or measure for EWCM (egg white cervical mucus indicating your most fertile time).

Honestly, I don’t want to work at it. I just want it to happen. I just want to enjoy this time in my life where me and SuperFutureDad dream about our nugget. Where we wish for what could be.

Perhaps this is faulty logic and I’ll never get that little baby I’ve been hoping for.

But if that happens, I can always turn to the nearest TTC group, right? And I can tell all the ladies there about the next time I POAS.

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The Name Game

Even though my husband and I are still working on this whole pregnancy thing, my mind has already started to wander toward names. What on earth are we going to name this (these) little nugget(s) that we bring into the world? My favorite name, let's call it 'T' (the name shall remain, well... nameless to protect the identity of who used it. It can be a sensitive subject, no?), has already been taken. Yeah, yeah, we're not supposed to stake claims on names, people are allowed to choose whatever name they like, blah, blah, blah. But to me, it's like that episode of Sex And The City when Charlotte and the girls are going to the baby shower of an old friend. When someone asks the woman what name she has picked out, she says, "Shayla." Of course, that name turns out to be Charlotte's years-ago made up unique baby name and Charlotte accuses her of stealing the name. The SATC girls storm out and Charlotte is forever miffed that someone nabbed her chosen future-baby-name.

I get anxious just thinking about names for my future children. I want something original but not trendy. Confident but not stuffy. Old fashioned but not... old. SuperFutureDad wants something that won't get our kid laughed off the playground. And of course, I'm already annoying him with talk of someone who doesn't even exist yet!!! What if we have a boy? What if we have a girl? What if we have twins? What are your family names? Would someone be offended if we didn't carry their name? Would someone be offended if we did? How do you feel about unisex names? Do you think kids today know who Clifford the Big Red Dog is (family joke)? What's your great-grandmother's middle name again? ARGH!

The worst part of all of this is that at any time, if we choose to keep our FutureNuggetName under wraps, someone can swoop in and steal it! Just like what happened with 'T'. There is no way SuperFutureDad's associate could have known this is my favorite name and even if he/she had, how ridiculous would I have to be to claim it as my own? Only a total nutter would do something like that, right?

So... in no particular order I am calling dibs on these names: Penelope, CoraLynn Ann, Berkeley, Drew, Joshua, Victoria, Vivian, Douglas, Patrick or Padraig, Johan, William, Wendy, and Frank(ie).

I never said I wasn't a nutter, did I?

The Weight of Mommyhood

I am not a thin girl. By doctors’ standards, I’m not obese either. I’m what people refer to as an athletic-looking girl. That’s a nice way of saying I’m chunky. Boys in this category are called husky. Whatever you call it, the truth is I’ve got meat on my bones.

Weight has always been an issue for me. When I was younger my brother would torment me by asking if I’d painted my jeans on (nowadays that may be a compliment to those women who can wear ‘skinny jeans,’ another style that is off-limits to my squishy body). As I got older, and trained harder for sports, my body leveled off. Through high school and college, I weighed between 145 and 150 pounds. Not bad for a 5’8” frame. Again, I’ve never been a thin girl but during those years much of my weight came from muscle.

Then a funny thing happened when I moved to the Midwest. I discovered foods like tater tot hot dish (a casserole to my non-plains readers out there), slow-cooked roasts and broasted chicken, and I re-discovered comfort food favorites I had long ago given up like potatoes and lasagna.

I also fell in love with SuperFutureDad (he’s the cook responsible for all those yummy dishes). And the time I had been devoting to the gym and staying in shape, quickly gave way to cozy nesting nights with him on the couch, each of us with our own bucket of popcorn. Needless to say, I began gobbling down the memory of what I used to look like with fistfuls of buttery kernels.

And then I got a vicious wake-up call. Earlier this summer, I went to the doctor to talk about having a baby. I stepped on the scale, fearing the worst, and nearly dropped an F-bomb when I read the number: 178 pounds. Ok, that was SO MUCH worse than I expected. I finally accepted what I knew to be true; I was no longer ‘athletic.’

Immediately my head filled with dreadful images of what pregnant me would look – and feel - like. Shapeless muumuu’s on TV. Four chins. Gestational diabetes. More rolls than the local bakery. Shortness of breath. Cankles. Hypertenstion. The list was endless. I weighed so much, my doctor told me I should only gain 15-25 pounds during gestation. I knew for a fact that most of my skinny friends gained about 30. What a blow. I felt like Shamu. Only Shamu, being a whale and all, is actually allowed to gain upwards of 400 pounds during a pregnancy (technically, Shamu is a boy, but you get the idea).

As I left the doctors office, I vowed to shape up before getting pregnant. Sounds slightly counterproductive, eh? But for me, being the ‘athletic girl’ has always been my thing. It’s what helps keeps me shopping at the same stores that advertise in my favorite magazines, and most importantly, it’s what has kept me healthy. Healthy enough to have a safe pregnancy. Healthy enough to be an active mother. Healthy enough to be around for a long time for my kids. I’ll never be a MILF, but I do want to be a good example of how a healthy, athletic mother should live her life; if for no one else than for me and my family.

So, I’ve got yoga and dance classes on my roster for fall. Anyone want to join me?

Sharing Simple Pleasures

Okay, I’ll admit it. I’ve already begun thinking what life would be like with a little nugget to call my own. I try not to let the thoughts go too far… I don’t want to jinx it.

But there are some things about my childhood that I can’t wait to share with my kids. And, there’s a few ‘firsts’ that I anxiously await. Here we go…

In the… our-baby-is-so-precious category:
Lying on the ground in the park reading with them nestled in the stroller that I gently rock with my toes
Holding them in my arms for the first time
Coming home to find the baby perched on SuperFutureDad’s chest, both of them fast asleep
Bonding while breastfeeding at night
Listening to them breathe hard while deep in slumber

Representing the… aren’t-they-so-cute category:
Reading books together snuggled side-by-side in a cozy bed
Nesting by the fire
Watching them eat sand as we make sandcastles on the Florida beach
Seeing them run into Nai Nai and Ricky’s arms
Helping them swing a tennis racket for the first time

Nominees for the… not-that-they’ll-give-a-crap category:
Introducing them to the Mickey Mouse Club, Babysitters Club, Sweet Valley High, Judy Blume
Playing old episodes of Friends, 90210, Psyche, Gilmore Girls, How I Met Your Mother, Big Bang Theory
Showing them tapes of my tv stuff and magazines featuring my articles

In the… it‘ll-be-nice-to-have-someone-to-play-with category:
Catching them in my arms as they jump off the edge of the pool
Sharing the joy of a warm, creamy cup of hot chocolate in the middle of winter
Sledding
Chasing each other with squirt guns

Entries for the… just-like-mum-and-dad-used-to-do-with-me category:
Dancing to Motown oldies while doing the dishes
Sunday morning family breakfast (I’ll whip up blueberry pancakes, SuperFutureDad will take care of the bacon)
Continuing the annual tradition of cutting down our Christmas tree
Having nightly dinners together

I also commissioned SuperFutureDad to come up with a few items.

Nominees for the… I-just-want-to-be-a-dad-already-darnit category:
Teaching them sports and outdoor activities
Having the baby fall asleep in my arms
Watching them take their first step
Seeing them interact with the dog
Laughing when the baby poops or pees on mummy
Watching them learn new things for themselves
Spending time as a family

I know that this list make parenting sound easy and delightful. And I realize (through watching other mums and dads) that it’s not like that all of the time. But I’m hopeful that these simple pleasures will outweigh any daily trials we endure.

What were/are some of your parenting pleasures?