Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Baby Braggin' Wednesday: We Are So Screwed

OMG! I did something I totally shouldn't have today... and the results are, well, as scary as hell.

Let me explain...

A few months ago I became an avid follower of a couple of dozen blogs about parenting, motherhood, baby products and design. One day as I was checking the daily influx of postings to my Reader, I spotted an entry from a blog written by a married gal who, at the time, was trying to conceive her first child. She, like me, had done something she probably shouldn't have... and, like me, the results were terrifying.

You see, she was writing about a Web site called Make Me Babies - a computer-generated ripoff of Conan O'Brien's (love him!) legendary 'If They Mated' segments. It's supposed to give you an example of what your Future Nugget will look like. So I'm doing things a little different this week for Baby Braggin' Wednesday. And you'll soon see why it's entitled 'We Are So Screwed'!

SuperFutureDad and I are the average, All-American couple; blond, blue-eyed, big-boned. Here's what we looked like on our fabulous wedding day. Isn't he a dream?? I realize my face is partially covered so for those of you who don't know me, this may not be the best shot. But he looks great and that's why I want to use it here (thanks to Shari Bare Photography for our darling pics!!!).

So... you might think from that pic, that our future nugget might be a bit of a looker, no? That's right, NO, is the appropriate answer. I give you Evidence A - FutureNugget#1:

Look at the size of that our kid's forehead!!!! Captain Chesley "Sully" Sullenberger could've landed US Airways Flight 1529 on that thing! At least he/she/it has some cute freckles and a smile. Nice frame, too, btw.

But it all goes downhill from there my friends. Evidence B - FutureNugget#2:


This is too scary for words. And is that a tie around his neck? He looks like one of those creepy Benjamin Button kids who look like they're 80-years-old from birth. Wrong. So wrong.

Evidence C - FutureNugget#3:


Apparently our child will be Asian. I'm guessing we've adopted (which is something I've always wanted to do, btw). Maybe Make Me Babies knows something I don't.

Especially when you look at our daughter's brother - Evidence D - FutureNugget#4:



Oh, and look! We've adopted another daughter from Asia and this one has cornrows! Awesome!

Evidence E - FutureNugget#5:


These creations are just so funny! I'm not sure how SuperFutureDad feels about them, perhaps he'll leave a comment telling us?? (hint, hint)

In all seriousness, I would love to adopt children. It's a strenuous and expensive process and from what I hear from friends who have done it, entirely rewarding. So if this is what the future holds for us, then I am all for it!

Anyway, I've saved the best for last. I think we may have a winner!

Evidence F - FutureNugget#6:


Look at our cutie-patootie pirate!!! I'm loving the hair - ginger curls! A forehead slightly less prominent than Tyra Banks's. An adorable smile that will certainly get him out of trouble. I think this kid is as close to a perfect combination as we can get. No whammies here!

So... which one is your favorite??? Leave me a comment... and, if you're brave enough, email me your 'If They Mated' pics and I'll post a montage!!!!!


  1. That is hilarious. Seriously, I think I'm going to have nightmares about future nugget #2.


  2. Oh my GOD...that is too funny! Maybe you guys should stick to adoption?

  3. Hi Patricia:
    What silly fun!! I like "E"!! Thanks for the giggles ( have a silly post out there right now too if you get a chance, come on out).


  4. Those nuggets definitely made me giggle!

    Even though we are "one and done", I might just do this for fun one day (-:
    I can do a real life side by side comparison. What a hoot that would be!

  5. I'm sure the nugget will look just fine. I know I don't have any Asian background in my family so not sure where that came from???? Fun though.

  6. No question about it, Nugget#6 is the winner! Neither one of you have anything to worry about, you both look great!